My now ex and i have been together for two yeas some off and on he has a drinking problem and does not know how to treat me and can be mean. Im pregnant and we live together but just broke up he wants to fix things and i dont feel we can since we tried 5 times now and never get it right. Should i try again with him for the baby or leave things the way they are.I need advice on what to do about the relationship?
Theres never a set number of chances. I would give him a try you never know what it takes to save people. Please answer my question please. I posted it a few mins ago.I need advice on what to do about the relationship?
The only way you should take him back is if he FIXES his drinking problem. Not just saying ';i will fix it';, but actually making life changes. If you have family and friends, I would say let him suffer for awhile. You are pregnant with his child so he will have to be in your life no matter what. Tell him you care about him/love him but can't go back to the same thing and can't put your child through a situation where his parents may break up. If he loves you, he will change. Sometimes men change when they have children.
Monday, November 21, 2011
I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
I am having an extremely difficult time getting over a past boyfriend. We were together for about a year and a half, and spoke every day, and saw each other often. I find myself thinking about him a lot, and I just start crying at the drop of a dime. It's only been a few days, so I'm hoping it will get better, but it seems to only be getting worse.
Should I seek counseling or even consider medication? I'm just really depressed.
Or, are there other things that I could try to do to help me not be so sad? Please help: any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
Don't worry. In time you will forget about him. But don't expect for it to happen right away. You were with him for a year and half, so how can you forget all about him so soon. It's okay for you to cry and feel bad about your breakup. Let the tears flow, think of him, and let it all out. You will see that one day you say to yourself,';Hey I haven't thought about him at all today.'; Then you will know that you're getting over him. Stay busy. If you work, good. Go out with your friends and have a good time but don't try to start another relationship right away. Give yourself time to heal before you think of someone else. I promise things will get better. Time heals all wounds. I know. I've been through it. Give it time,honey. That's all you can do. Don't try medication yet. That should be your last resort. Good luck. Stay strong.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
I have been there. the only thing that has helped me was time to get over it and realizing that i wasnt the one who messed up.
Should I seek counseling or even consider medication? I'm just really depressed.
Or, are there other things that I could try to do to help me not be so sad? Please help: any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
Don't worry. In time you will forget about him. But don't expect for it to happen right away. You were with him for a year and half, so how can you forget all about him so soon. It's okay for you to cry and feel bad about your breakup. Let the tears flow, think of him, and let it all out. You will see that one day you say to yourself,';Hey I haven't thought about him at all today.'; Then you will know that you're getting over him. Stay busy. If you work, good. Go out with your friends and have a good time but don't try to start another relationship right away. Give yourself time to heal before you think of someone else. I promise things will get better. Time heals all wounds. I know. I've been through it. Give it time,honey. That's all you can do. Don't try medication yet. That should be your last resort. Good luck. Stay strong.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
I have been there. the only thing that has helped me was time to get over it and realizing that i wasnt the one who messed up.
Any advice on the best way to get over a relationship?
Putting it in its simplest form, it's been 4 months since my boyfriend cheated on me, I trusted him 110% and so now i find it hard to trust anyone, but all im doing is thinking about him every second, i've tried many things and i thought over time it would get better, but im finding it harder to cope with. Please give me some tips???Any advice on the best way to get over a relationship?
My x-husband had a problem with flirting with woman at his restaurant till i told him i was tired of it and that i was leaving him well a week later he was already dating a girl he was already talking to before i broke it off with him..Well not to take ur time men will always have the need for attention so never feel like it was ur fault or feel like ur ugly because ur not!Now to get over him the only way to this is by loving urslelf first always put urself firts hang out with friends including guy friends .Next always leave men thinking u dont want them be a some what of a ***** they love it when women have control in the beginning.One more thing please give urself at least time to heal n dont hate all men for what was done to u .Your ex will get a taste of his own medicine so remember karma is a ***** so try to play hard to get always give urself 4 months before the first kiss trust me men fall head over heals when they find a challenge.So play nice but remember love urself before u could love someone else take care n dont fee l like its the en of the world u will find someone better ..ohh and one more thing always have men treat u like a princess if they dont then kick them to the curb..lol byeAny advice on the best way to get over a relationship?
you need to shut off I think its HARD is what some people wont understand you trust him so much then he cheats and leaves.... I know how you feel when my first love cheated on me it took a year for me to start to move on I started by gradulay keeping myself busy and trying not to have the time to think of him and distracting myself i would stop all contact if you can just tell him you bth need some time to think then when you feel comfortable contact him as a friend just try to remeber what he did
It's never easy, so don't let people try to tell you it is... The best thing to do is GET OUT.. go on dates with other guys, I'm not talking serious dates, just having fun. If you start to think about him, call a friend. If you feel lonely, find someone to talk to. And most of all, don't talk to him. The more you talk to him, the worse you will feel.. I wish you the best, just hang in there... It DOES get better :)
My x-husband had a problem with flirting with woman at his restaurant till i told him i was tired of it and that i was leaving him well a week later he was already dating a girl he was already talking to before i broke it off with him..Well not to take ur time men will always have the need for attention so never feel like it was ur fault or feel like ur ugly because ur not!Now to get over him the only way to this is by loving urslelf first always put urself firts hang out with friends including guy friends .Next always leave men thinking u dont want them be a some what of a ***** they love it when women have control in the beginning.One more thing please give urself at least time to heal n dont hate all men for what was done to u .Your ex will get a taste of his own medicine so remember karma is a ***** so try to play hard to get always give urself 4 months before the first kiss trust me men fall head over heals when they find a challenge.So play nice but remember love urself before u could love someone else take care n dont fee l like its the en of the world u will find someone better ..ohh and one more thing always have men treat u like a princess if they dont then kick them to the curb..lol byeAny advice on the best way to get over a relationship?
you need to shut off I think its HARD is what some people wont understand you trust him so much then he cheats and leaves.... I know how you feel when my first love cheated on me it took a year for me to start to move on I started by gradulay keeping myself busy and trying not to have the time to think of him and distracting myself i would stop all contact if you can just tell him you bth need some time to think then when you feel comfortable contact him as a friend just try to remeber what he did
It's never easy, so don't let people try to tell you it is... The best thing to do is GET OUT.. go on dates with other guys, I'm not talking serious dates, just having fun. If you start to think about him, call a friend. If you feel lonely, find someone to talk to. And most of all, don't talk to him. The more you talk to him, the worse you will feel.. I wish you the best, just hang in there... It DOES get better :)
Can someone please help identify what is wrong with this puppy without patronizing me via relationship advice?
My boyfriend's 5 month old husky has been weak and uncoordinated, especially in his hind legs for the past 12 hours.
Yesterday he was fatigued but not weak or uncoordinated. He woke up without an appetite, drank a lot of water, and vomited it back up within 10 minutes. I called my vet and after feeding him small portions of boiled chicken and rice alternated with small portions of water throughout the day, the vomiting stopped yesterday afternoon, and his appetite returned.
But today when he woke up he was weak and had a hard time standing after first waking up. Since then, he has improved but frequently loses his balance.
I am posting here because I am hoping someone who has had experience with these specific symptoms will be able to help identify what may be wrong. My car is in the shop and my boyfriend is planning on waiting until Tuesday to go to the vet because he thinks the dog is over the hump. If you think this is an emergency, I agree, but it's not what I asked. Thank you.Can someone please help identify what is wrong with this puppy without patronizing me via relationship advice?
Let's start at the beginning. Is he up to date on his vaccinations? I ask only because if he is then it rules out distemper, hepatitis, leptosporosis, parvovirus and parainfluenza.
With the assumption that he is up to date, when he goes to the bathroom - is his urine a dark yellow or is it really watery (if you can't tell while he's urinating - slip a bowl or piece of tupperware under him while he pees so you can check). The reason I ask this is that is you take away his water over night then in the morning his urine should be a dark yellow - if it's not then that is indicative of kidney failure.
The vomiting makes me think that liver failure is not the issue.
You say he has a hard time standing after waking up - do you find that he is in general ataxic (wobbly when he walks)?
My prime thoughts if he is vaccinated are wobblers, worms, vertebral injury, or even vestibular disease. If he is not vaccinated - distemper or parvo are possibilities.
Obviously, no matter what, you need to get him to a vet as soon as you can, and just keep in contact with your vet to keep him apprised of the situation until you can get there. Keep feeding small amounts of bland foods and make sure he isn't left alone if their are stairs in the house. It would be tragic for him to lose his balance on or near stairs!
Good Luck.Can someone please help identify what is wrong with this puppy without patronizing me via relationship advice?
It's either parvovirus or distemper. Similar symptoms but what bothers me is the neurological issues. Either way, that puppy will be dead by Tuesday if you wait.
I'm sorry, dont mean to be harsh. Please get puppy to the vet, even if it's the emergency vet. You seem like a caring person and you would feel horrible if the poor pupster died.
Your dog could either have a nuerological problem or a back injury (IVDD). Lack of balance sounds more like a nuerological problem. These are definetely emergancy situations. A lot of times the vet can do a simple exam and let you know what the problem is. Good Luck
My older dog began showing these symptoms. The vet placed him on a bland diet (just as yours did). The symptoms abated for awhile then returned. It turned out his liver was failing. By the time he got back to the vet there was nothing to be done. Get him to the vet as soon as possible and explain that the symptoms keep returning.
ok well you are stupid for asking people what is wrong it sounds like the dog could be poisoned and should be rushed to the nearest animal hospital, and you're an idiot for saying that it's an emergency and not doing anything about it, like rushing it to the vet instead of calling.
Yes, it sounds like an emergency and I would take him to the vet today. It sounds like what a co worker of mines dog got, can't remember the name, but if not treated in time, the dog could die. GET him to a VET today, at any cost. How many series of his puppy shots has he left to take?
check the dog for ticks. if you find one remove and put it in a zip lock bag. it sounds like it could be lyme disease. without seing the dog it is hard to say. what other symptoms.
is he too warm. dogs can get heat stroke/exhaustion.
did he get overheated before he started to show signs of illness.
please update and let me know how he is doing.
good luck
You already know the answer...it is an emergency..HOWEVER...check the dog's ears...sometimes inbalance (as with humans) can be because of severe ear infection.
Other than that, I can't help you. As you know, you really need a vet and I anm NOT trying to patronize you.
first watch him if its his legs its most likely that he got hit or stomped on. make sure he hasnt been around horses and for the vomiting i would say worms or hes just sick and cant sleep at night srry this is all i got.
this can be a LIFE THREATENING disease!!!!!
I hope you understand and GET THAT DOG TO A VET.
Call a friend, call a family member.
If the dog dies it will be your fault! It HAS to get to the vet FAST.
He could have heat stroke? Could be a spinal injury....there are quite a few possibilities....has the vet actually looked at ur dog?
If you think it could be heat stroke give him a cold bath and keep him cool.
Good Luck!
:)
Rent a car? Call the vet and see if they have like a pet ambulance?
Parvo, get puppy to vet.
might be rabies
Could be tick paralysis. If so, it can be fatal. And it's the season where ticks are beginning to get bad.
He may have been poisoned, or bitten by a snake. (have you felt all over him for knots, bumps or lesions?)
Could he have been injured some other way? (hit by a car, kicked by a nasty kid?) Does his back seem painful when you put pressure on it? (he might yelp or nip at you.)
I can't think of a whole lot of illnesses that cause spinal symptoms in a young puppy. Sounds more like injury to me. But only the vet can tell you for sure.
My suggestion to you is to get your pup to the vet and not listen to what anyone on here has to say except the ones that say to get it to a vet. You are going to get a whole variety of different answers and truth be told most likely not a single one of us is a vet and definately not a single one of us has seen the pup except you (unless you have friends on here answering this)....so we can't really tell you what it is, your best bet is your vet, that is where he\she has been trained and whatever it is doesn't sound good. I had a german shepard\husky mix that I had to put down because of liver failure (or kidney...I don't remember which) she had gotten really really thin and it was hard for her to walk. The reason I can remember what it was is because I was very upset. When I went in they checked her and came out and told me what the problem was and then told me that they were going to have to euthinize her (however you spell it) I was so upset.....my point is...do something now, while you can!rimmel
Yesterday he was fatigued but not weak or uncoordinated. He woke up without an appetite, drank a lot of water, and vomited it back up within 10 minutes. I called my vet and after feeding him small portions of boiled chicken and rice alternated with small portions of water throughout the day, the vomiting stopped yesterday afternoon, and his appetite returned.
But today when he woke up he was weak and had a hard time standing after first waking up. Since then, he has improved but frequently loses his balance.
I am posting here because I am hoping someone who has had experience with these specific symptoms will be able to help identify what may be wrong. My car is in the shop and my boyfriend is planning on waiting until Tuesday to go to the vet because he thinks the dog is over the hump. If you think this is an emergency, I agree, but it's not what I asked. Thank you.Can someone please help identify what is wrong with this puppy without patronizing me via relationship advice?
Let's start at the beginning. Is he up to date on his vaccinations? I ask only because if he is then it rules out distemper, hepatitis, leptosporosis, parvovirus and parainfluenza.
With the assumption that he is up to date, when he goes to the bathroom - is his urine a dark yellow or is it really watery (if you can't tell while he's urinating - slip a bowl or piece of tupperware under him while he pees so you can check). The reason I ask this is that is you take away his water over night then in the morning his urine should be a dark yellow - if it's not then that is indicative of kidney failure.
The vomiting makes me think that liver failure is not the issue.
You say he has a hard time standing after waking up - do you find that he is in general ataxic (wobbly when he walks)?
My prime thoughts if he is vaccinated are wobblers, worms, vertebral injury, or even vestibular disease. If he is not vaccinated - distemper or parvo are possibilities.
Obviously, no matter what, you need to get him to a vet as soon as you can, and just keep in contact with your vet to keep him apprised of the situation until you can get there. Keep feeding small amounts of bland foods and make sure he isn't left alone if their are stairs in the house. It would be tragic for him to lose his balance on or near stairs!
Good Luck.Can someone please help identify what is wrong with this puppy without patronizing me via relationship advice?
It's either parvovirus or distemper. Similar symptoms but what bothers me is the neurological issues. Either way, that puppy will be dead by Tuesday if you wait.
I'm sorry, dont mean to be harsh. Please get puppy to the vet, even if it's the emergency vet. You seem like a caring person and you would feel horrible if the poor pupster died.
Your dog could either have a nuerological problem or a back injury (IVDD). Lack of balance sounds more like a nuerological problem. These are definetely emergancy situations. A lot of times the vet can do a simple exam and let you know what the problem is. Good Luck
My older dog began showing these symptoms. The vet placed him on a bland diet (just as yours did). The symptoms abated for awhile then returned. It turned out his liver was failing. By the time he got back to the vet there was nothing to be done. Get him to the vet as soon as possible and explain that the symptoms keep returning.
ok well you are stupid for asking people what is wrong it sounds like the dog could be poisoned and should be rushed to the nearest animal hospital, and you're an idiot for saying that it's an emergency and not doing anything about it, like rushing it to the vet instead of calling.
Yes, it sounds like an emergency and I would take him to the vet today. It sounds like what a co worker of mines dog got, can't remember the name, but if not treated in time, the dog could die. GET him to a VET today, at any cost. How many series of his puppy shots has he left to take?
check the dog for ticks. if you find one remove and put it in a zip lock bag. it sounds like it could be lyme disease. without seing the dog it is hard to say. what other symptoms.
is he too warm. dogs can get heat stroke/exhaustion.
did he get overheated before he started to show signs of illness.
please update and let me know how he is doing.
good luck
You already know the answer...it is an emergency..HOWEVER...check the dog's ears...sometimes inbalance (as with humans) can be because of severe ear infection.
Other than that, I can't help you. As you know, you really need a vet and I anm NOT trying to patronize you.
first watch him if its his legs its most likely that he got hit or stomped on. make sure he hasnt been around horses and for the vomiting i would say worms or hes just sick and cant sleep at night srry this is all i got.
this can be a LIFE THREATENING disease!!!!!
I hope you understand and GET THAT DOG TO A VET.
Call a friend, call a family member.
If the dog dies it will be your fault! It HAS to get to the vet FAST.
He could have heat stroke? Could be a spinal injury....there are quite a few possibilities....has the vet actually looked at ur dog?
If you think it could be heat stroke give him a cold bath and keep him cool.
Good Luck!
:)
Rent a car? Call the vet and see if they have like a pet ambulance?
Parvo, get puppy to vet.
might be rabies
Could be tick paralysis. If so, it can be fatal. And it's the season where ticks are beginning to get bad.
He may have been poisoned, or bitten by a snake. (have you felt all over him for knots, bumps or lesions?)
Could he have been injured some other way? (hit by a car, kicked by a nasty kid?) Does his back seem painful when you put pressure on it? (he might yelp or nip at you.)
I can't think of a whole lot of illnesses that cause spinal symptoms in a young puppy. Sounds more like injury to me. But only the vet can tell you for sure.
My suggestion to you is to get your pup to the vet and not listen to what anyone on here has to say except the ones that say to get it to a vet. You are going to get a whole variety of different answers and truth be told most likely not a single one of us is a vet and definately not a single one of us has seen the pup except you (unless you have friends on here answering this)....so we can't really tell you what it is, your best bet is your vet, that is where he\she has been trained and whatever it is doesn't sound good. I had a german shepard\husky mix that I had to put down because of liver failure (or kidney...I don't remember which) she had gotten really really thin and it was hard for her to walk. The reason I can remember what it was is because I was very upset. When I went in they checked her and came out and told me what the problem was and then told me that they were going to have to euthinize her (however you spell it) I was so upset.....my point is...do something now, while you can!
Men - would you really be in love with this girl? Women - what would you do? (Relationship advice)?
I am a woman who was married to a man at a young age. We also have a daughter together. He cheated and we broke-up, when my daughter was 9 months old. We are seperated now, but still legally married. We now live in 2 different states. He is visiting to see our daughter and I found a video of him and his new girlfriend having extremely graphic, nasty porno-type, anal and oral s*x, and a picture of them (that was taken at a studio) in his wallet. I guess I was always hoping that we'd get back together eventually, but now I am extremely upset. I had so much in common with this man, loved him more than anybody and we had a family. My daughter is so incredibly excited to be spending time with him and I know she wants both parents to be her family and be together.
My question is: Do you think that a girl who would do that stuff after dating for a short while is just a sexual fling for this man, or could they actually have potential at a strong, loving relationship? I know men can be kinky, but at the same time I don't think they'd respect a woman like that long enough to really be serious about her due to the woman not being ';respectable'; or ';someone they could take home to mom';. ie: she must be sleezy to let him do that and while he likes it, the realtionship is just temporary.
Men: would you be long term with a girl like this?
Ladies: would you ever want to work something out with a guy that did that in the long run for your family? Would you hold on to that hope like I had been, or would you give up?
What do you think?
I am crushed. :-(Men - would you really be in love with this girl? Women - what would you do? (Relationship advice)?
k, i hope i dont offend you because i am going to be honest here. first, i think the photo is more indicitive than the sex video. if they are going to have professional pictures done, they are more than just a fling. i have had my share of flings, or guys that i casually date, and i have not been to get pictures done with one of them. most likely, they are together. i cant help but to feel confused about why you hold onto the notion of getting back with him. to me, that is like keeping some ripped, stained, old, ugly jeans on your shelf in the hopes that one day they will fit again. but why? they are crap to begin with. and when you put them back on you will see that they are just an ugly pair of jeans. see what i mean? you hold on to the hope that you will in 4 years maybe, possibly get back with the ';ex';. i can see if he was a good guy, good father, treated you like a princess, etc but he isnt. so what are you waiting around for? yes, you love him. i totally get that. But it is not worth it. you have to let go, and if you stay married ';for the $'; that is not healthy. it is at the cost of your emotional well being, and i highly doubt that the extra $ is worth catering to his needs, not saying things in case he doesnt give you the $, etc. I feel like he has moved on, and you still havent. and i feel like the ';$'; is your excuse for keeping the marraige. if that is really what it is about, then i am wrong. but i feel like there are other reasons. basically, i feel like you are hanging on to something that is not worth it. and i feel like you will not meet anyone and fall in love again if you continue to hang onto that hope because you still are not over him and will not be until you move on completely...Men - would you really be in love with this girl? Women - what would you do? (Relationship advice)?
Yeah, I would see her as nothin more than a sexual tool for me to play with. She wouldn't have any other purpose. This is of the POV if I were single, because I wouldn't even entertain that now.
I agree with Sheloves 100%
The sex is just that, sex. As to whether it's a relationship that they care for each other, is a completely different question. I cannot speak for other men, but as for me, I'm comfortable with my own choices enough that if I care for someone, in a loving relationship, then I will respect them whether they are wild in the bedroom or not. Men's heads are turned temporarily by sex, but their attention will soon wander unless there is more than that.
What the girl did within the confines of her relationship with your 'ex' husband really does not concern you. You may still be in love with your husband but both of you have not worked on getting back together. Find out if he wants to work it out and see where that may lead. It would be nice if both parents are in the same house for your daughter's sake.
Edit:
Talk to him Girl. If you all can make this work that will be one more marriage that did NOT end in divorce. The fact that he has not asked for a divorce during this time is a good sign.
Try to put the video thing behind you. I commented on such a thing on the board recently and I got a bunch of thumbs down for it. I do believe that women who are not married to men should not be so sexually 'liberated' as I feel there can be no respect from the man there. So I do share your view on it. However, you should not let that deter you in trying to get back with your husband.
I sincerely wish you all the best and I hope you guys can work it out and put this marriage back together!
More than likely he is in it for just the sex. If you do get back together I would try something different to make him not wander off anymore. Yes I would work things out with him. But I am telling you know it will not be easy. Do it because you want to not just because of your kid.
I'm afraid it could be a long term relationship to be very frank with you. Men like other than just normal bedroom routine, so good exciting sex makes a relationship stronger. The only thing that could undermine that is if she was a slut.
First think if you really want that man back, and if you're sure, dump the guy you're seeing now, and then go and get your man back. Don't speak bad about his current girlfriend, that would be a mistake, just show him that you're better than her.
Maybe he just wanted ';a freak';! Sounds like he got what he wanted too. Just because she gets a bit more ';kinky'; in the bedroom, doesn't mean thier relationship won't last. The obvious is that he doesn't want you! If he did, he wouldn't have his slong in another womans openings! LoL...even if she is a fling, and you get back together...he will still cheat on you. Perhaps its time to wake up and smell the coffee. Move on with your life.
txjeepn, I am reporting you for being nasty.
If I was you, HBIC I would probably file a report against that girl and take that video and show it to her mother. I've been a snitch for a long time and I've gotten very good at it. You should get copies of that video, you never know when they may come in handy.
I don't think her behavior (solely based on those photos) means anything at this point. He could be serious about her, he might not be, it depends on the man. But considering you were married to him at one point, you'd know best.
As far as holding out hope goes, I wouldn't do that. I'm a realist and my thinking is, if he isn't showing any interest in me to indicate otherwise, it isnt there. So I'd forget about him and focus on my current relationship. And don't worry, you're the mother of his child and you aren't going anywhere so if it's meant to be, it'll be.
Nothing you described is dirty/nasty or indicative that she's not respectable.
You don't know much about sex and what men like/want, do you? Anal and oral are practiced my millions of respectable people all over the world...
If I were separated from my partner and they were in a new relationship I'd accept that they'd moved on.
Edit: Just because you wouldn't do it doesn't make a girl who would not respectable...
If I am in your shoes, I would probably observe how my ex husband is treating me. If I can still sense that he still have feelings for me even just a bit (romatically) I would consider the sexcapade video was just past time for him and I could still win him back. But if I sensed that he is not in to me anymore, I will let him go and move on. It'll be hard at first but I will not let anybody take away the respect I still have for myself and the love I have for my daughter.
Why may I ask were you going through his wallet ? If he is your Ex, that is out of bounds. How would you feel if he went through your purse ?
Maybe the reason you are separated is because there are also so many things you would not do with him ! It could also be that she does not know that he recorded her. The possibilities and probabilities can be numerous.
HBIC, I like you so I'm not going to be a sarcastic as I would like on this one but this may still sting a little so brace yourself.........
Sounds like somebody got some green eye goin on now doesn't it. It's seems a little funny that now you know how she puts it on him she gotta be all kinds of sleezy, ho'ish, not worthy of respect, or meeting his mom. Get a grip girl!
BTW. You two must be pretty cozy if you have access to his phone and wallet like that. I mean where was he when you got that? In the shower? After what? Act like you know girl. My bet is that you have a fair shot to put it on him like he likes it. If you really want him then do your thing. If you aren't willing to go that far then let the man go baby. It ain't for you and there's nothing wrong with that. You have a responsibility to yourself to DO YOU!
So you said you had a lot in common with him? As in you make these kind of videos and pictures like him? If so post them up lets take a look.
And what where you doing snooping in his wallet. Where was this video? In his wallet. How did you come in possession of this video?
This sounds like a total bunch of BS.
My question is: Do you think that a girl who would do that stuff after dating for a short while is just a sexual fling for this man, or could they actually have potential at a strong, loving relationship? I know men can be kinky, but at the same time I don't think they'd respect a woman like that long enough to really be serious about her due to the woman not being ';respectable'; or ';someone they could take home to mom';. ie: she must be sleezy to let him do that and while he likes it, the realtionship is just temporary.
Men: would you be long term with a girl like this?
Ladies: would you ever want to work something out with a guy that did that in the long run for your family? Would you hold on to that hope like I had been, or would you give up?
What do you think?
I am crushed. :-(Men - would you really be in love with this girl? Women - what would you do? (Relationship advice)?
k, i hope i dont offend you because i am going to be honest here. first, i think the photo is more indicitive than the sex video. if they are going to have professional pictures done, they are more than just a fling. i have had my share of flings, or guys that i casually date, and i have not been to get pictures done with one of them. most likely, they are together. i cant help but to feel confused about why you hold onto the notion of getting back with him. to me, that is like keeping some ripped, stained, old, ugly jeans on your shelf in the hopes that one day they will fit again. but why? they are crap to begin with. and when you put them back on you will see that they are just an ugly pair of jeans. see what i mean? you hold on to the hope that you will in 4 years maybe, possibly get back with the ';ex';. i can see if he was a good guy, good father, treated you like a princess, etc but he isnt. so what are you waiting around for? yes, you love him. i totally get that. But it is not worth it. you have to let go, and if you stay married ';for the $'; that is not healthy. it is at the cost of your emotional well being, and i highly doubt that the extra $ is worth catering to his needs, not saying things in case he doesnt give you the $, etc. I feel like he has moved on, and you still havent. and i feel like the ';$'; is your excuse for keeping the marraige. if that is really what it is about, then i am wrong. but i feel like there are other reasons. basically, i feel like you are hanging on to something that is not worth it. and i feel like you will not meet anyone and fall in love again if you continue to hang onto that hope because you still are not over him and will not be until you move on completely...Men - would you really be in love with this girl? Women - what would you do? (Relationship advice)?
Yeah, I would see her as nothin more than a sexual tool for me to play with. She wouldn't have any other purpose. This is of the POV if I were single, because I wouldn't even entertain that now.
I agree with Sheloves 100%
The sex is just that, sex. As to whether it's a relationship that they care for each other, is a completely different question. I cannot speak for other men, but as for me, I'm comfortable with my own choices enough that if I care for someone, in a loving relationship, then I will respect them whether they are wild in the bedroom or not. Men's heads are turned temporarily by sex, but their attention will soon wander unless there is more than that.
What the girl did within the confines of her relationship with your 'ex' husband really does not concern you. You may still be in love with your husband but both of you have not worked on getting back together. Find out if he wants to work it out and see where that may lead. It would be nice if both parents are in the same house for your daughter's sake.
Edit:
Talk to him Girl. If you all can make this work that will be one more marriage that did NOT end in divorce. The fact that he has not asked for a divorce during this time is a good sign.
Try to put the video thing behind you. I commented on such a thing on the board recently and I got a bunch of thumbs down for it. I do believe that women who are not married to men should not be so sexually 'liberated' as I feel there can be no respect from the man there. So I do share your view on it. However, you should not let that deter you in trying to get back with your husband.
I sincerely wish you all the best and I hope you guys can work it out and put this marriage back together!
More than likely he is in it for just the sex. If you do get back together I would try something different to make him not wander off anymore. Yes I would work things out with him. But I am telling you know it will not be easy. Do it because you want to not just because of your kid.
I'm afraid it could be a long term relationship to be very frank with you. Men like other than just normal bedroom routine, so good exciting sex makes a relationship stronger. The only thing that could undermine that is if she was a slut.
First think if you really want that man back, and if you're sure, dump the guy you're seeing now, and then go and get your man back. Don't speak bad about his current girlfriend, that would be a mistake, just show him that you're better than her.
Maybe he just wanted ';a freak';! Sounds like he got what he wanted too. Just because she gets a bit more ';kinky'; in the bedroom, doesn't mean thier relationship won't last. The obvious is that he doesn't want you! If he did, he wouldn't have his slong in another womans openings! LoL...even if she is a fling, and you get back together...he will still cheat on you. Perhaps its time to wake up and smell the coffee. Move on with your life.
txjeepn, I am reporting you for being nasty.
If I was you, HBIC I would probably file a report against that girl and take that video and show it to her mother. I've been a snitch for a long time and I've gotten very good at it. You should get copies of that video, you never know when they may come in handy.
I don't think her behavior (solely based on those photos) means anything at this point. He could be serious about her, he might not be, it depends on the man. But considering you were married to him at one point, you'd know best.
As far as holding out hope goes, I wouldn't do that. I'm a realist and my thinking is, if he isn't showing any interest in me to indicate otherwise, it isnt there. So I'd forget about him and focus on my current relationship. And don't worry, you're the mother of his child and you aren't going anywhere so if it's meant to be, it'll be.
Nothing you described is dirty/nasty or indicative that she's not respectable.
You don't know much about sex and what men like/want, do you? Anal and oral are practiced my millions of respectable people all over the world...
If I were separated from my partner and they were in a new relationship I'd accept that they'd moved on.
Edit: Just because you wouldn't do it doesn't make a girl who would not respectable...
If I am in your shoes, I would probably observe how my ex husband is treating me. If I can still sense that he still have feelings for me even just a bit (romatically) I would consider the sexcapade video was just past time for him and I could still win him back. But if I sensed that he is not in to me anymore, I will let him go and move on. It'll be hard at first but I will not let anybody take away the respect I still have for myself and the love I have for my daughter.
Why may I ask were you going through his wallet ? If he is your Ex, that is out of bounds. How would you feel if he went through your purse ?
Maybe the reason you are separated is because there are also so many things you would not do with him ! It could also be that she does not know that he recorded her. The possibilities and probabilities can be numerous.
HBIC, I like you so I'm not going to be a sarcastic as I would like on this one but this may still sting a little so brace yourself.........
Sounds like somebody got some green eye goin on now doesn't it. It's seems a little funny that now you know how she puts it on him she gotta be all kinds of sleezy, ho'ish, not worthy of respect, or meeting his mom. Get a grip girl!
BTW. You two must be pretty cozy if you have access to his phone and wallet like that. I mean where was he when you got that? In the shower? After what? Act like you know girl. My bet is that you have a fair shot to put it on him like he likes it. If you really want him then do your thing. If you aren't willing to go that far then let the man go baby. It ain't for you and there's nothing wrong with that. You have a responsibility to yourself to DO YOU!
So you said you had a lot in common with him? As in you make these kind of videos and pictures like him? If so post them up lets take a look.
And what where you doing snooping in his wallet. Where was this video? In his wallet. How did you come in possession of this video?
This sounds like a total bunch of BS.
Some issues involving my boyfriend and the romance (or lack thereof) in our relationship. Advice?
Well, we've been dating for almost three years now, and I've noticed over the last year or so we've become more like best friends who touch eachother and less 'lovers'. There's nothing romantic about our relationship, even if I try to make an effort by putting his arm around me or holding hands.
We've talked about it, and we've decided that the lack of connection is starting to drive us away from eachother. He's being distant and I'm becoming needy. But we do still really love eachother.
Does anyone have any advice?
How do you spark romance in a relationship?Some issues involving my boyfriend and the romance (or lack thereof) in our relationship. Advice?
You can't spark a romance if there is nothing to spark. Try and remember what attracted you too each other in the first place. It has only been three years, it is probably just stress from work and family that is coming between the two of you.
When and if the two of you have a night off together try to pop in a movie; make some popcorn; sit on the couch (snuggle) and enjoy each other with no intention of having sex after wards. Also you may try rubbing his shoulders when he gets home from work if you know that he has had a rough day.
If he begins to show you the same attention, maybe surprise you with dinner ready when you get home from work then you guys will be just fine.
I have been married 15 yrs and it is all about give and take. You can't do all the giving or all the taking then it just doesn't work. Communication is also a very big key in making it work, always be honest and open.
Best of luck to you, God Bless.
We've talked about it, and we've decided that the lack of connection is starting to drive us away from eachother. He's being distant and I'm becoming needy. But we do still really love eachother.
Does anyone have any advice?
How do you spark romance in a relationship?Some issues involving my boyfriend and the romance (or lack thereof) in our relationship. Advice?
You can't spark a romance if there is nothing to spark. Try and remember what attracted you too each other in the first place. It has only been three years, it is probably just stress from work and family that is coming between the two of you.
When and if the two of you have a night off together try to pop in a movie; make some popcorn; sit on the couch (snuggle) and enjoy each other with no intention of having sex after wards. Also you may try rubbing his shoulders when he gets home from work if you know that he has had a rough day.
If he begins to show you the same attention, maybe surprise you with dinner ready when you get home from work then you guys will be just fine.
I have been married 15 yrs and it is all about give and take. You can't do all the giving or all the taking then it just doesn't work. Communication is also a very big key in making it work, always be honest and open.
Best of luck to you, God Bless.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Are there any websites, books, or magazines out there for young adults in dating/relationship advice?
I try to compare a married woman's life with mine but it's just not the same I feel whenever I want advice about what to do with my relationship. I'm not 33 and I'm not going to pretend like I am. Is there anybody that can refer me to something that helps young adults with relationship advice?Are there any websites, books, or magazines out there for young adults in dating/relationship advice?
not that i can think of, but the good thing about a relationship is you can make it up as you go along....
you don't need to have someone else keeping your relationship alive, believe in yourself....
good luckAre there any websites, books, or magazines out there for young adults in dating/relationship advice?
There is alot of different pages on relationships here.I think you can see them all from this one page.But I have personally been there and to the blog.Some interesting stuff.
cosmopolitan.com
cosmogirl.com
seventeen.com
You should read the book 'Not all the good ones are taken'
Yessssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!! It's called cosmopolitan!
it has all the tips and tricks on how to get oyur man happy,
not that i can think of, but the good thing about a relationship is you can make it up as you go along....
you don't need to have someone else keeping your relationship alive, believe in yourself....
good luckAre there any websites, books, or magazines out there for young adults in dating/relationship advice?
There is alot of different pages on relationships here.I think you can see them all from this one page.But I have personally been there and to the blog.Some interesting stuff.
cosmopolitan.com
cosmogirl.com
seventeen.com
You should read the book 'Not all the good ones are taken'
Yessssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!! It's called cosmopolitan!
it has all the tips and tricks on how to get oyur man happy,
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