I dont know about this guy..... creating a relationship advice please?

I have been in a number of wrong relationships. This one took a while for me to agree to go out with him as I was holding back - been burned too many times. I decided the other day to go for it. He hasnt been pressuring me at all he has just let me know that if I ever wanted to go on a date then he would really like to take me out. I wasnt ready when he asked before but the other day I felt it was the right time for me to move on and give another relationship a try.





He has had manic depression - though at the moment he is very well and so that is not an issue but I thought I would mention it to give a fuller picture. He is a nice guy - Christian (Im atheist - but understand Christians are meant to be kind and nice), non violent. He works out and is a personal trainner and total sports buff.





Its just he isnt my usual type and Im scared. It seems the right thing to do but there is always this fear that I might get hurt or I might be leading him on.





I do like him though he isnt my usual type which is good I guess but how do I know if I am going for him because he is nice to me and not because I actually like like him?





I hope that makes sense. Any advice? Like how should I take it slowly.... normally I jump right in running - how do I just let a realtionship evolve itself?





Thanks :)I dont know about this guy..... creating a relationship advice please?
First, you should know that Christians are NOT non-violent. Have you ever heard of a Holy War? That means that I'm killing your people because you do not hold the same religious beliefs that my people have and maybe even have different gods! So, that said, let me move to the actual question here.





I am puzzled by: ';I know if I am going for him because he is nice to me and not because I actually like like him?'; So, are you saying that most people you actually like like, are not nice to you also? This confuses me. Typically, people like other people who like them and are nice to them! It's not a complicated formula. Because you've said you've been in a number of wrong relationships and that this one isn't your usual type, I'd say that in the past, perhaps your judgment hasn't been so keen and maybe it's time you try something that isn't your ';usual.';





NEVER jump in running! You do not ';let a relationship evolve itself'; - that implies that you are controlling it and therefore it cannot naturally evolve. Evolve means just that - it will unfold and it will either be great, bad, or somewhere in between. Just enjoy it now for what it is and see where it goes. Also, you should know if his manic depression is under control with meds or not in order to fully understand him and what he is dealing with - that's a complicated illness and it can't be taken like ';no big deal'; because he seems fine just this moment.





Good luck with it, enjoy and have fun. Let the other things take care of themselves in time.I dont know about this guy..... creating a relationship advice please?
you know, in loving someone, there's only two things that might happen, it's you'll be hurt or not. but if you'll never try it, you'll never know what would be the result is.





it's better to try and get hurt than not to try at all, but you're still hurting...ryt?
i say go for it. but...you have to know that if you're not a christian you wont be sharing the same values that he is and this might pose a problem in your (possible) relationship.
well you can ask this advice on jamrie.com


its more of a personal advice website.


people over there might be able to help you out.





i go there all the time!
Hi there,





You know? Sometime you shouldn't put too much pressure on your heart, you should just let your heart feel the real love slowly, little by little, and let it finds the truth love for you.





What I meant was you should take time to study about him more and more, but I didn't mean that you didn't learn enough about him. Studying about someone is just like reading a book, you can not just read the cover and first couple pages of it and get whole things and its meaning. Moreover, you should give yourself a try with this love, don't be scare of getting hurt, becasue it could happen at any time even you are not loving him.








Good luck, :-)








Alex
The way you let a relationship just evolve is by doing just that. Let time take over. Just like it takes a baby 9 months to be born, relationships are similar in that it takes time for it to evolve. If anything, you can apply the 9 months it takes to give birth to a baby to build a friendship first then move from there. I've been married for 2 months now, and I was friends with my now-husband for about 5 years before we even went out. Then we dated for 3 years before getting married. It's absolutely worth waiting for that right person. Because of that friendship, I got to know very well who I was getting married to. So just take your time, it'll all come about.
Get to know him first. Not as a friend, not as a boyfriend, but get to kno him as a person. Observe his character is he honest, trustworthy. Write a list of what u need, want, will and will not tolerate in a mate. If u find him worthy as a person, step two is to compare him to your list.





How to take it slow? Instead of focusing on impressing or pleasing him, be yourself and do only what's comfortable for you. Don't do anything physical until your absolutely sure that he measures up. Then wait another month to see if he maintains his credibility. Time will tell





As far as liking him (yea I get it. It's like do u like HIM or do u just like the attention he's showing you?!) you would kno if u actually liked him unless u got to kno him right? So do that. Just get to kno him, u can't lose and getting to kno someone never hurts!