Lost in my relationship--need advice?

Why am i feeling this way? Someone help me?


am a firm believer of while taking Anti-depressants you have a hard time finding attachment/love/emotions towards anything or anyone. At 23 years old I feel life has become so hard on me. I have been through many tragic events over the past 4 years, from losing my mother, grandfather and being in ICU after a bad car accident life has really been an ongoing struggle. About 3.5 years ago right after my mother passed away I began taking Anti-depressant medication first lexapro and now zoloft. Through these times I have found myself to be cold hearted and emotionless towards my family and my previous and current girl fiend. I am like a walking zombie with my arms out looking to feel some form of emotion. I pack my life with going to school, working and eating to keep away from these ongoing negative thoughts that eat at my brain on a daily basis. These obsessive thoughts are all focused on my girlfriend and I make her out to be someone she is not. When I first met her I was crazy over how she looked and treated me and now that two years have passed, its actually gotten a lot better but my mind and body will not accept it. I tell myself she is ugly, not good enough for me, and this confuses the crap out of me. If I were to draw you a person who I would want to be my wife without question it would be her. We do share the same qualities, outlooks on life and get along very well for the most part. In my past relationships and the current one, i feel the need to push people away and because I have no feelings- Its an escape from having to deal with any of this. I turn to inter coarse and other sexual activities to bring out some type of feelings. I am struggling so bad with this and it hurts so much, you have no idea. I would like to hear what you would have to say about this. I thank you very much for giving me your time. Hope to hear from you soon.





Ps: I got to counseling and my grl is away on vac for a month and the questions of wether or not I love her are still obsessive amongst my thoughts. I let her on great terms. My mind doesnt want me to have a connection.


12 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.Lost in my relationship--need advice?
I think talking to someone like a psychologist is your best bet


When you get to the point where your own thoughts have power over your emotions, and you're unhappy most of the time, you probably can't deal with it yourself. As far as ';trying'; to have emotions, i think i know exactly what you mean. And i have no idea what causes this or how you change it. It seems like I'm incapable of experiencing any extreme of emotions besides melancholy and apathy. What keeps me going is the belief that it will change in the future. I've read studies about the teenage and young adult brain chemistry, and it is a time of frequent and rapid change. Taking pills doesn't help that, in my opinion.


I can relate to almost all the things you talk about, but i can't offer any advice. I struggle too with obsessive thoughts or thoughts which seem to disagree with what i actually believe i think.


If your anything like me, i know how hard it is to talk aboutLost in my relationship--need advice?
the best solution is to pray. Confess your problems to God and he is ready to help you no matter what!
my anwser is to ask god to help you he loves you
It's good that you're getting counseling and you should keep doing this. Maybe you feel the need to detach from your girlfriend because deep down you still love her and are trying to protect all of your emotions. I really don't know though, and even if I'm right I don't know how you can fix that. Our emotions do strange things after going through extreme pain. What it does boil down to tho is that if you don't want to breakup with your girlfriend and even if you don't like her all the time you can't imagine yourself without her, then you still love her. Give yourself time, eventually things will stabilize.
well, it sounds like you aren't only lost in your relationship, but you're


well the first step is recognizing it.. which you've done, congratulations :]





somewhat in need of spontaneity in your life. it sounds like you do the same things every day as if you're programmed to.. which could be a contributing factor in the way you're feeling





to start, you could find a hobby you feel you enjoy and eventually connect to .. whether it be cooking, collecting something, photography, writing, art, a sport or whatever


- just find something you're passionate about to provide an oasis for you, when you feel bored or lost





and you obviously have feelings considering you have feelings about your situation now, and you felt the things you felt when you met your girlfriend.. and when you went through trauma recently you just might not be in touch with them





take time to meditate everyday-


reflect on your day.. what you enjoyed, what you hated, what made your day different from every other day, whether it be an interaction with a co-worker.. or a change in your eating pattern. no day is exactly alike.. so try to be more aware of your surroundings


-also, taking time to meditate will help you connect with your own feelings


the more you do it, the more easily it will come to you without thinking about it.. self-reflection will become involuntary





with the girl-


it sounds like you're in a great relationship, and it sounds like its just almost too good to be true, so you dont believe it.


the self improvement things i mentioned will help here too.


the first step to feeling more confident in a relationship is feeling more confident in yourself! :] also it sounds like she understands what youre going through .. if not, talk to her about it! that will help too!





also, try working out and exercising! when you work out, your body releases adrenaline and endorphins which make you feel happy and fit! if you incorporate things that make you feel good into your everyday routine, you'll feel a lot better !





hope i helped you out! any more questions, add details and il try to get back to you!
okay first maybe you could try lower and lower doses of the meds. that may help a little emotion back. i know what your talkin about. my brother had the same reaction to this stuff. and show her you still love her and think she is beautiful and is very much good enough for you by doing something to show her your REAL feelings for her: :)


hope this helped?