Complicated relationship situation, advice needed鈥︹€?

Me and my girlfriend split up in Jan 08 after being together for 15months, and got back together in April 08 for 7 weeks, then split up for what is now 4months.Things were not so good, we were both treating each other badly so we finished, there was no cheating or anything. I saw her once a week probably as we had mutual friends, we鈥檝e been chatting on the phone recently. We both said that we still love each other and love each other, were both not sure though if getting back together would be good or not though. It didn鈥檛 work out then so why now? I have to admit I have changed and addressed some of the things which got in the way of us working out. She told me last night that if we got back together it needed to be for the right reasons, she says that she fins me so attractive it may cloud her judgment of us in a relationship, even though its really important that you are very attracted to your partner, maybe she is focusing on the need for the physical aspect of our relationship rather than the more important elements like love, respect etc? I鈥檝e never stopped loving her, ever , we both said that if we had a car crash, we would want to see each other first, she would be the person I would want to see first and she said the same, I take that as we both love each other.





Im just very very confused as I am only just starting to 鈥榤ove on鈥?from us and if I went back to her and we started again and then it didn鈥檛 work out, I would be back to square one with the grieving process, the first three months were sheer hell, very dark! I never want to go back to those times, ever. Awful.


As ever with me its never straight forward, sorry.


Any suggestions?








Complicated relationship situation, advice needed鈥︹€?
Same old... same old...





I've changed, you've changed, this was that problem, that was this problem, bla bla bla. There's a reason why you dated 2x and broke up 2x. If you REALLY loved each other as much as you THINK you do, there is NO WAY you'd let her walk out of your life twice (and the same goes for her). I know you're saying ';that's not true, I've changed and we're different'; but everyone says that and it never works. Stop lying to yourselves and each other, move on, and have a nice life.





Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, I'm a crazy idiot and have no idea what I'm talking about.... so are you a glutton for punishment, desperate for attention, a ';Fool me 3x'; kind of person, or someone who is smart (meaning you won't get back together)Complicated relationship situation, advice needed鈥︹€?
Move forwards, not backwards. You may have addressed some of the 'problems' but it seems like the biggest problem is a personality clash, and you can't change who you are. I suggest you don't see her or talk to her at all for a month or two, which I know will be hard but is necessary.
Huh???