Help!!! what should I do??? serious relationship advice?

I have been with my fiance for over 7 years, for which we have lived together for 6 years, we have no kids as of yet and no mortgage as we are university students.





She is so gorgeous and nice and I do love her more than anything, but then enter her family for some reason they really hate me.





Her dad used to try bullying me even though im nearly 25 and take good care of his daughter.





He also tried bullying her, by telling her to say she was still scared off him even though shes 23 when he was drunk, this is when I stepped in and defended her and told him she had no need to be scared of him and what he was doing was pathetic.





There was also another incident where he was bragging about knocking her elder sister out years earlier from a head butt again when he was drunk, I also opposed this by telling him he was out of order and a bully for beating his daughter and trying to boast to me about it





Since then the whole family has turned against me, I dont get a birthday card of any of them even though we have to send all of them one on their birthdays...





The men try picking fights with me at family gatherings for no reason, its like they literally find anything to start on me about, and even though I am careful with what I say as a person, they can twist anything nice I have to say in to something horrible as an excuse to start on me, especially her brother in law who is close to her dad...





Its not even like im scared, I would fight them if needs be as they are just mouthy bullies, but I choose not to because of her, her honour, and most of all because its her family.





now i know no ones perfect and I am far from that, but I can honestly say I have done nothing but be nice to her family, yet they continue to be nasty towards me.





I do feel sorry for my fiance as I know its not her fault, and she did defend me once by not speaking to her dad for several months for threatning to fight with me... again no reason apart from him being drunk... they all seem to want to be rocky balboa when they have had a drink.. especially him





Yet my fiance never wants to discuss the way they treat me... she has recently started to brush it all under the carpet and wants me to start going to family gatherings of hers again and forget what they have done, and although I love her dearly I cant bring myself to like or trust a large part of her family and the way she dismisses there behavior towards me, I also feel that this may come beetween us as they have picked up on it and are applying pressure to my poor fiance... she has even started getting in moods with me about it





i do understand the poor girls dilemma this is her family, and as familys go mine is no better, although they would never bully or threaten her.





I keep beating myself up about this and its taking its toll on my health and I aint eating properley, so any serious comments will be highly appreciated, as my mind is working overtime trying to work out a solution.





I was chronically bullied as a child and vowed that once it had stopped, that it would never happen again... and although I am a fully grown man who can cut the rough if needs be, I do feel like history is repeating itself





every sentence above reads the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth...





can anyone shed some light on this, so I can finally lay this to rest, before it lays me to rest.





please remember this girl is the love of my life





big thanksHelp!!! what should I do??? serious relationship advice?
Wow, interesting family. Either stay away or ignore them. Enjoy life and don't worry about them.Help!!! what should I do??? serious relationship advice?
I had the same issue with my boyfriend/father of my child[but then again he wasn't innocent about the situation either] but anyways...I would try talking to her again to get her to understand that it is uncomfortable for you to be there at the gatherings because of all that.Ask her how would she feel if she was in your shoes? And if that doesn't work I would try to talk to her dad when he isn't drinking and see how that goes that will show that you aren't afraid to face him in any situation and that you really love your fiancee and you want to be accepted into the family .I hope this will help.Good luck!!
Wow! First let me say you are the better man, better then all of her family. It takes a MAN to do what you have done. I applaud you and I am proud of you.





History is not really repeating itself. As a child you could do nothing about the situation. You had no choice. Now, as a man, you do have a choice because you COULD kick some butt but you chose not to. It takes a strong man not to do what he knows he can do so well. Do you see the difference? And, you chose not to because it is your fiance's family. Bravo!





Your fiance is intimidated by her family. She knows how they are when they have been drinking. And, it takes alcohol to bring out how they really feel about you. They let their liquor do the talking for them because they cannot say it when sober. It's a cop-out on their part. Her wanting you to forget what her family has done to you is wrong because they will do it again. She knows it and you know it. Her wanting you to go back to family gatherings is unacceptable. Her lack of sensitivity is amazing. As much as you love her she obviously doesn't care about your feelings and that is selfish. Are you sure this is what you want in a woman? She may be the love of your life but I'm not sure if you are the love of hers. Sometimes when we are in love we don't see what is in front of us. In your case it's selfishness, hers.





She doesn't want to take a side in this circus. However, if she truly loved you she would not have to. You should come first and you are not. She doesn't seem to mind these games her family is playing with you. Why does she not care how you feel? I believe you love her more then she loves you and that is sad. This is affecting your health. Is she worth it? Can you see yourself married to her AND her family continuing to cut you down? Is this what you want?





Love should make you happy not cause you to have health problems. Why is she getting into moods with YOU? What have YOU done to cause her moods? Nothing. Why doesn't she grow up? You, my friend are truly a gentle man. Love should not make you ill. Think long and hard on this ';love of your life'; person. Personally I think you are too nice for her and her wacky-alcoholic family. I don't want you sick. Stay well dear.
Boozers are losers.


Keep contact with her family but do not get into arguments


If he is violent, report it.