I feel undesirable after a bad relationship. Advice?

In this relationship I faced emotional wear and tear. I was also sexually assaulted by him. My therapist said that when you're in a place you dont want to be in, (like sexual or emotional abuse), that you feel you will be ';punished '; for staying with a person who you know was bad.





I feel like such a loser after being with him. I feel undesirable to everyone. If i were someone else, i wouldnt want to date me or hang around with me. I feel I dont deserve anything, because I was so dumb to stay with him. How can i stop thinking this?I feel undesirable after a bad relationship. Advice?
You do need to change your attitude. You messed up in the past in choosing the wrong type of person to get in a relationship with. You should now be better able to read the signs that will indicate that someone is controlling and possibly abusive. One can learn from one's mistakes and become a stronger person. You have probably put up with a lot in your life, more than most other people have. You need to move on, and focus on getting yourself back together and healed from your past relationship. You certainly don't need another relationship right away, unless it is with someone that can help you heal and allows you to be free to develop more of your potential. One can not be passive in life, one must fight one day at a time to be a factor in this world. You need to spend time getting to know yourself better, to explore your potential in the areas of your interests, and develop more of your talents and skills. The more deeply you know yourself the more deeply you will connect with other people. The more you know about your capabilities, the more you will know what type of person will work well in a relationship with you and work well in regards to your future plans. You do need to get stronger emotionally. Meditation will help. Just get in a comfortable position, breath deeply, tensing your stomach muscles a little when breathing in, relaxing your stomach muscles when breathing out, while focusing on some of the uncomfortable emotions you have been feeling. You can close your eye, if that will help you focus. Do this regularly like an exercise. It will be difficult at times to do, but like an exercise, it will bring results over time. Along with meditation, exercise(strength %26amp; aerobic, but not excessive), and eating healthy with supplements if needed, can help you to get stronger spiritually, so that you can have more energy and your personality can shine again in the future. Overcoming things in one's life that are difficult gives you character, which is one of the most valuable personality traits you can have. If you work hard while you don't have a relationship, you will do so much better with your next relationship. One should not dwell on the past, but use what energy you have to fight for a better future